47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize