i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
