im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
