no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Moan for me like Helen Keller
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Holy shit dude........stairs
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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