it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
