i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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