Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize