i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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