I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize