I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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