Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
