franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
