i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
