If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
