Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
