Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Alive.
So much puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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