I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
