do herpes really smell.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize