I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
