Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Randomize
