That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
