we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
MIDGETS
????
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
