He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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