I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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