She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize