Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
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I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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