JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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