if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
