She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I looked at my own cervix.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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