Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
