i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Vodka?
Forever.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
