My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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