so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
