Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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