Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
