Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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