dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
