Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Randomize