party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
