That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
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we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
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It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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