Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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