his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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