remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize
