HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
