well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
