I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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