Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
