coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
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