If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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