sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize